The learning curve

I have been a late bloomer, not sure if it is because of the year I was born but Allen was taken around the classes in P6 when she was reported to Mr Wangolo for writing love letters to boys, Loy received letters from boys telling her that she was ‘the only bean in their soup' and that ‘they would love her till L. Victoria dried’. And when I read straight talk kids in P.4 were having sex left, right and centre with the neighbors son in the banana plantations. May be I was indeed a late bloomer.

My first crush Patrick was in S.2, he was a ‘baller’ and the dirtiest boy you would ever come across. He had a girl friend - Pamela (I wonder what happened to her) she was perfect my opposite in fact – she was neat, clean and wasn’t childish as I was sometimes branded.

Then my second crush Robin – the new boy in school, still in S.2. He looked dangerous to me, I day dreamt about him that first term holiday, imagined him as a biker dude. He got a girl friend Maureen ( as per facebook she is engage to be married) – she was beautiful and every guys wanted a piece of her. In S.5 third term I got my third fourth crush Simon ( I really don’t know what I saw in him, he was arrogant, rude and mean – everything I despise today ) we lasted three months and after that I vowed never to let a dude to make me cry.

S6 Vac came fifth crush Brian his kisses smelt like food gone bad, he tried to have sex with me at ever opportunity possible – he even once got me to his neighbor’s house, nobody was home so that we could have sex. Goodness dude tried hard but I was harder. He was paranoid, insecure, controlling and very Jealous especially of any male attention I got. I remember one Charles who smoked like a chimney, drunk like a fish and introduced me to withdrawal symptoms – the shakes. Brian would never let me out of his sight once he smelt Charles around. To the extent he would wait for me to finish work from 6pm till 11pm keeping guard – we lasted 3 months.

First year Uni came George – my final crush to date, he knew I had a crush on him – ( he is everything I pray never crosses my daughters path) he called me to his house once to cook for him and his friend, luckily I had some pride, crush or not I wasn’t going to be at his back and call. Then his famous quote – ‘tulibantu bakulu lets just screw, not strings attached’ I ran for dear life – my father would be proud.

Being a late bloomer isn’t too bad I guess at least I never had pregnancy scares as KS the first weeks of school after holiday. Least I never had to run around telling my secrets to the whole school and later cry my eyes out that everyone was talking about me. At least I had control over my life. So if you are to call me a whore I wouldn’t take that kindly because my learning curve is just the way I like it.

Food for thought

"Our strenth grow out of our weakness".

Ralph Waldo Emerson